Why ADHD Didn’t Break Me (being seen did)
Ever felt like you were both "too much" and "not enough"—at the exact same time?
Because I have. For most of my life, actually.
The Moment It Clicked
Three years ago, my daughter turned two.
She was curious, expressive, and strong-willed—all the things you hope for in a growing toddler.
But that stage of development—the constant exploration, the overstimulation, the unpredictability—collided head-on with something inside me I didn't have language for yet.
I found myself unraveling at the edges in ways I couldn't explain. Small things triggered enormous reactions. Every day felt like sensory overload.
And the self-talk was brutal:
"Why can't I handle this?"
"Other parents seem to be managing fine."
"I must just be lazy… or too weak to handle the stress."
But deep down, something didn't feel right.
It didn't feel like laziness.
It felt like something I'd never been taught to understand.
Finding the Words (and the People)
At first, I did what many of us do—I searched quietly.
Late-night Google spirals. Instagram reels. Podcasts.
And somewhere in that digital rabbit hole, I stumbled across Clay Gill and Thomas Woodhams—two people speaking openly about ADHD in a way that didn't feel clinical or patronizing. It felt human.
That opened the floodgates.
I found Alex Partridge's ADHD Chatter Podcast.
I devoured Jessica McCabe's How to ADHD channel on YouTube.
Eventually, I found a therapist. Not to "fix" me—but to help me unlearn the shame I'd built over a lifetime of masking.
And slowly, the inner dialogue started to shift.
Grief and Relief—Two Sides of Discovery
When you finally name something that's quietly shaped your entire life… there's this weird duality.
On the one hand, relief.
A sense of, "Oh my god—it wasn't just me."
On the other, grief.
Because now you see how much energy you've spent trying to be someone you're not.
The pendulum swung between those two feelings for months.
But that pain? That process?
It was all absolutely necessary.
And I wouldn't change any of it.
Because once I found language, I found people.
And once I found people, I found tools.
And once I had both?
Everything started to shift.
What Helped Me Most (So You Don't Have to Start From Scratch)
Here are a few of the resources that truly made a difference in my journey—especially in the early days:
1️⃣ Clay Gill & Thomas Woodhams — Real, raw storytelling that helped me feel seen
2️⃣ ADHD Chatter Podcast (Alex Partridge) — Insightful convos with creators who "get it"
3️⃣ How to ADHD (Jessica McCabe) — Practical tools and deeply empathetic explanations
4️⃣ Galarm — A daily go-to. It's like a to-do list with alarms that actually work. I can choose my snooze, mark tasks as “done,” and stay on top of everything without relying on memory alone.
5️⃣ Todoist — My planning HQ. I use it to manage client projects, personal goals, and home tasks. Clean layout, recurring tasks, and priority flags keep things from falling through the cracks.
6️⃣ Goblin Tools — A free brain-dumping tool that turns overwhelm into step-by-step action. Great for emotional regulation and executive function overload.
And while tools and podcasts helped me start—therapy helped me heal.
If it’s accessible to you, working with a therapist who understands ADHD can be a game-changer. Especially for things like emotional regulation, RSD, and unlearning a lifetime of shame.
None of these replaced the work.
But they made it possible to start.
Because the truth is—most of us aren't broken.
We just haven't been seen.
